I Have So Been Working

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Just because I don’t post on here in forever doesn’t mean I’m just sitting around playing Minesweeper for hours on end.

Half-hours, maybe. Shut up. It helps me think.

I just got finished formatting all the portfolio photos for the new stuff I’ve been churning out over the past couple of months.

And in the spirit of making-things-ever-so-much-more-annoying-and-complicated-than-they-should-be, I just figured out that I need to buy a new image gallery plug-in. My old stand-by, which I’ve been happily using for YEARS, now refuses to delete images. And the developers seem to have dropped it in the dust, so it’s not getting fixed.

God dammit.

Anyway, I’ll have to re-format all the portfolio sections. The old ones still work, but I’m not creating any more galleries until I get the software sorted out. So. The new stuff isn’t officially ready yet, but here’s a sneak peek.

Back on My Bullshit

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I haven’t picked up a paintbrush in a while.

I’m starting to realize (or at least accept) that my creativity goes through phases: writing, painting, building weird websites, homebrewing RPG campaigns…

Sometimes–and this is kind of distressing when it happens–the phases don’t include much creativity at all. I get stuck organizing my digital folders and files for hours. Days, even. I craft the most beautiful schedules and excel sheets you’ve ever seen (not that I follow any of them for long, but damn, doing it makes me feel like I’m accomplishing something). On those days, I worry that my creative side has simply dissipated into nothingness.

However, one of the very best ways to prompt myself to get back into one project is to be almost finished with another one.

My first full-length novel is in the FINAL DRAFT stage and I’ve promised myself that I’ll have it DONE by the end of this year! Yes! A lifetime milestone for me…I’ll be able to say that I’ve actually finished a huge literary project!

But wait…what’s all that stuff over there?

Why, it’s my stack of stalled works-in-progress in the corner of the art studio! I’ve been ignoring them for far too long. Oh, I suddenly know what that one needs. And this one would look great if I stuck this dead bug to it.

I should pull them all out RIGHT NOW and get back into hands-on-mess-making! Colors! Shapes! Textures! Dead bugs! I AM AN ARTIST AGAIN!

Yeah, yeah, yeah, the novel. I’ll get to it. I just have to figure out how to smooth out that one clunky plot point and I don’t feel like thinking about it right now.

The important thing in all this is that I’m learning that this is just how I work, and I’m learning to work with the way I work instead of berating myself for not working the “right” way. Just because I’ve been writing for months on end doesn’t mean that I’m not still an artist, and sometimes those damn file folders NEED to be organized better.

Anyway, here’s what I’ve been up to over the past few days. My art is always a collaboration between me and the work itself, and I’m excited to find out where these want to go.

All A-Buzz

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Just spent an hour fiddling with print-on-demand sites and looking up sublimation presses…but then it occurred to me that there’s already so much silly pre-fabricated crap in the world: do I really want to add to it?

The POD sites are so shiny and they’ve got so much STUFF and it looks SO GOOD with my designs on it and then I try to work with their design programs that always turn out to be way more fiddly and frustrating than I want to deal with. Then when I finally get a “product” ready to go, the base prices make me sick—and in order to make any profit at all I have to charge even MORE?! Do people really want to pay $45 for a goddam T-shirt?

Well, no. Judging from my previous attempts at selling my art with this method, they do NOT. I don’t blame them. I wouldn’t.

I should repurpose stuff from thrift stores. Paint and draw on it myself. Each piece totally unique. (And thus just as expensive, considering how much time I’d have to put into it, but still–at least I’d get the money instead of the printing company.)

Perhaps I do need a kiln.

And a giant printer.

Of course, all the time it would take to make these unique items would mean charging more, but I feel like I’d actually be selling something worth the price.

I should buy a set of fabric paints.

I’ll need glaze.

And an…oh, I already have an iron. (Thanks, Grandma.)

A 3d printer would be nice, too.

In other news, I’m working on a new assemblage piece. It’s a heartfelt expression of my deeply emotional response to the fact that my studio seems to be attracting all the bees in the county who have about a day left to live. The working title is WHERE THE HELL ARE ALL THESE BEES COMING FROM AND HOW ARE THEY GETTING IN HERE AND FOR FUCK’S SAKE WHY DO THEY WANT TO DIE IN MY STUDIO.

Well

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Okay, I’m finally happy with the way this site is coming along. I still have a LOT of work to do on all my other sites. It’s overwhelming, but to be honest, I’m really enjoying the whole project–a massive re-design from the bottom up is something that’s been needing to happen for quite a while. I’ve kept many of the basic concepts, tweaked a few others, and jettisoned a few that just didn’t do it for me any more.

I’ve always taken this kind of thing way too fast. The picture in my head is so grandiose and glorious (if a little vague), I want to see it DONE. So I get in a hurry, get frustrated and impatient, make snap decisions just to be doing something, and end up going in bad directions and running into walls. That’s the point at which I usually just have an existential crisis and give up for a week or so and then start all over again.

I’m really tired of that pattern.

So even though some of my platforms and final results will look pretty much the same as they always have, I guess the biggest tweak I’ve made this time is behind the scenes: letting myself take the time I need. Healthy pacing. Thinking things through  and sitting with all the options for a while before I blast forward. It’s okay to have placeholders, broken links, and sites-in-progress, as long as I am making progress, even if it’s just a little at a time.

Here’s a picture of my cat.

THPPPPPTTT

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Maybe I WILL just use my coded-from-scratch version of this. At least I can control the settings.

Note to self: Set up post categories with featured art in portfolio sub-categories and plunk it into the sidebar

Hello world! Now go away.

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No I bloody well am NOT “a collaborative architecture office committed to sustainable, ethic, humanist values.” It’s just that this is a new site with a new theme and I don’t feel like tweaking anything yet. 

I’m probably just going to go back to using my trusty MH theme but I kinda want to break away from the familiar routine so I’m still experimenting. 

WHAT

I CANNOT ADD A SITE BANNER IMAGE TO THIS?!

THAT WON’T DO.

No, there’s no art up yet. You’ll have to make your own art for a while.